Here I am, standing on the edge of the cliff I call 2008. About 7 months ago I wanted to jump off!
It was a year that began with hope, but quickly dissolved into devastation.
I survived my first real heartbreak, and ...shit.... this was beyond anything I could've imagined.
The painful, terrible realizations and unbearable sadness were so dramatic, I really felt like I was looking in on someone else's story - but it was all mine.
People tell you that time will heal, you'll feel better soon... blaa blaa blaa...
I never thought I would feel better, but I do.
I believe that the Universe sends you messages, and you have to open them up. I do, and they have helped me move forward. All my friends and my Mom and sister may not have known what to say, but just being there for me was pretty momentous.
For my self help, I got a trampoline. I love that thing! You cannot be bummed while jumping on a trampoline - it's just not possible.
I redecorated.
I worked. a lot.
I was Activity Coordinating.
I was also recording 2 Sims games: MySims Kingdom and The Sims 3.
Shit, it was crazy. I cried, I took people on a pub crawl.
I cried, then acted like a 6 year old who speaks some crazy language.
I cried.
... a lot.
But I was busy.
I bought a ticket.
...to Ireland & the UK!
I was feeling better...
I had hope, something to look forward to-
I saw old friends that I adore, and made so many new friends that I hold in my heart ♥ now too.
I went places I have dreamt of my whole life, and they exceeded my imagination. I found myself again; I realized my value and strength.
It brings tears to my eyes when I remember these times, and it makes me so happy that I recognize these meaningful moments to be as special as they are.
I have learned a lot. I went through so many emotions; I grew up even more. I know how it feels to have a broken heart... it sucks, and I dread it happening again ... but NOW I get it. I'm so thankful I'm capable of loving that strong, even when the pain is just as strong (and then amplified by like a gazillion).
The point is, I survived and triumphed.
All by myself.
Time does heal. It's not all
blaa
blaa
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Here's to 2009!
3 comments:
Yay! that post is all the colours of the rad-bow and then some. I am honoured to have been part of such an important year, and look forward to you showing us round your 'hood. may 2009 be more bodacious than anything that has come before, and may you continue to shine just that bit brighter than everyone else because of how there isn't even a word for how awesome you are. keep doing what you do - you make the world a better place by doing it.
Pablo
wow P...
thanks. and thank you for being a part of making my year end on a high note ;)
i'll keep doing my best...
i can't wait to show you my hood!
No YOU are kinda radd...thank goodness for your trip to Eire or us Irish would've missed out on a Rappstar! Ps. Still can't add you as my friend or rather add me as a follower, so i will just have to declare it here...I follow Nicki's Blog and it's AWESUM xxx
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