You know how it is, big ideas- big plans- and life gets in the way.
Well not in the way... it just is.
But whatever. That doesn't matter now...
Let me (please) reflect upon the following events which I am now going to discuss with myself.
1. I have been taking some amazing Voice Acting classes lately that have been shaking me up and the stuff that is spewing out of me is shocking, frankly.
ha
Not bad, oh no.
Actually it has been quite good. You see, it seems that something finally clicked in my brain that evolved out and then this evolution provided me with the knowledge that I can do much more than I gave myself credit for. We're talking commercial copy here folks. I always seem to think of myself as a kid. "I play kids".
Well ya know, this is just a part of me. I am actually a woman! Can you believe that?
Yes, I am.
So. I have a new confidence reading car spots, public service announcements and even that medical stuff. I still have a ways to go, but I feel competitive for the first time. I'm gonna make sure I stay in Ladytown for awhile cuz it feels goooooood.
2. Last month I had a session at EA during Creative Camp, a week when all the super Sims fans come and play the new game and check out the place.
I was in the booth and I could see them all on the other side. I kinda felt like an animal at the zoo! It was so fun to see how excited they all were, and it just makes me feel amazing to be a part of something like this... I hope Sims 3 is super popular so I can keep this gig for at least a little longer... I know something so rad will not last forever, but I love it and will savor it as long as I can!
I also started recording a new MySims game and it's gonna be so adorable. Just wait!! ♥
3. I am really loving that I am back in the cafe at the hostel. I do not love waking up at 6, but once I get to work it is fine. I also do not love hostelers who don't do their own dishes. Please, I beg of you... if you stay in a hostel, do your dishes! My hands are thrashed! I do have a great time though, and everyday I leave work I really feel like I have connected with people in the world, not just in my bubble. It feels so good.
4. On Monday it will be a year since I got dumped.
I cannot believe, honestly, how much better I am now. Better than I have felt in years actually. Focusing on myself and what I want for my future has really changed things... I used to think that was kinda selfish, but now I know that I am a better person to others when I pay attention to what my brain is trying to tell me. I'm kind of a dumbass sometimes, I act like I don't really care and can be pretty hard on myself.
Since my trip last October ♥, I just want to take it easy, enjoy the moments and not let myself get caught up in stupid bullshit. Believe me, this is not easy...
My trip abroad showed me what I am capable of all on my own, and I am so glad I know this now!
I'm just very conscious of counting my blessings. I am so lucky to have amazing friends, both near and far, and I want to make sure I nurture these friendships because ... well last year was fucking hard, and I had a lot of support. I think people were more worried about me than they said at the time, and I am thankful that they stuck with me.
5. On March 16 it will be four years since I lost my Dad. Just last Sunday, February 8, he would've turned 65.
You know when you're a kid, and you feel like you'll have your parents forever... but then you start getting older - growing up- and things start happening to your friend's parents. You start to realize mortality, and it sucks.
My Dad will always be in my heart, he supported me in everything I ever dreamt of. I cannot tell you how lucky this makes me feel. He will always be my Daddy.
The last 5 years of my life have really established some serious adult cred for me...
✶I lived in NYC
✶lost a parent
✶stayed with my Mom when she had brain surgery (she is so good now, just like before)
✶got dumped.
ugh!
The NYC part was amazing ( i think it helped prepare me for what was to come...), and while the rest of the stuff made me wonder how I could move on, I have!
Somehow I feel like this year mark of the dumpage has ended a whole lotta bad and I am ready for a whole lotta good.
As much as I believe Valentine's Day to be bullshit (when you're alone it makes you feel like you suck) ... I am, at heart, very sentimental and too romantic for my own good...
and ready for newness. I still have high aspirations for love with a normal guy (what is normal?) (not an addict or an actor! i knooow, harsh.). I do get down about it, but deep down I believe it's possible.
For the moment though, I will keep moving forward, write blogs when I feel inspired, and hang out with people who make my heart and brain happy.
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